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i know i know. [Monday, March 26th 2007] it's been a while. i don't even think anyone reads this anymore. but whatever. i'd like to re-cap my day. first of all, i wake up on time and get in the lovely shower. i threw on whatever, ate an oatmeal cookie for breakfast and went out the door. i was even early O_o. i then proceeded to first, second and third block. i got a 100% on the quiz for psychology, and i know my elements from 1-92 for chemistry (= jennifer and i left school to go see melo in the hospital. she was suppose to be having her baby, but the doctor's hope for the baby not to be born for a few more weeks to complete 40. sooooo we then just went to daniels and watched ice age dos. (= Sid the sloth baby. you know how i feel about him. afterwords, i came home and gave my daughter a bath along with my sisters son. they were stinky puppies O_o. THEN i went to fill up my tank, go to the bank, buy bagheera 2 collars and a name plate. she keeps running off, and i'm afraid someone will snatch her! i guess if they wanted her they'll just throw the tag out )= but lets not think about that. i then went to the mall (bad idea) i spent a little here and there, nothing much. i'm excited to know i get to put two checks in the bank because i failed to deposit my last one. (= yeee ya. now i'm home, showered, and homework-less. what could be better? 1

yea well. [Saturday, March 3rd 2007] i have two misquito bites on the top of my left foot. i'm exhausted. i have cramps. i took photos of the sunset at the beach today. i may get my hair permed tomorrow (crosses fingers) i have a lot of homework. i work tomorrow. kangflaknf adka;lrq;k nrfs;ng;sn goodnight. 1

fk. [Thursday, March 1st 2007] i have an F in ap statistics. grading period ends today. bye bye gpa. joy.

ahhh [Wednesday, February 28th 2007] i found my school/work i.d's. cynthia took them thinking they were hers. what a big bum she is huh? alnaldo found my atm card in jennifers yard, i must have dropped it while i was skipping across the lawn like a retard. i don't work today and i get paid. so pretty much, this day is going swell. yesterday i decided i'm not going to eat at work anymore. seriously. and that when i get home from work, i'm not allowed in my room (where the computer/photoshop is located) i have to imediantly put my stuff down, and work on my homework at the kitchen table. yesterday was my first day doing this, and i finished all my work THEN got on the computer. which worked a lot better. self control, practice it damnit. lmao. ironically, i was doing an outline on psychology about sensation & perception. it was talking about how you have selective attention spans and once you get off track, it's hard to get back. i was deep reading this book, because it was mad interesting.. when Jay and his friend walked in, his BIG friend that was shy and just said watsup and walked away. this did nothing, i continued reading until i heard a voice. this voice was singing, and it sounded really good. it wasn't jay, jay raps. what the hell. where's this coming from? it wa the BIG nigga. he was singing lloyd. swear i couldn't even remember what homework i was doing. i love singers. hmpf. to-do list: get gas, i'm on E. pick up paycheck . deposit this weeks and previous weeks paycheck. go to the mall. go to sally's beauty supply. go to marshal's. come home and do homeowork. charge camera battery. knock out so lovely. (=

sighs.. [Sunday, February 25th 2007] this weekend. was so wack that i had fun. so friday i go to school & work. i got 29572957 degree water splashed directly into my eyeball. i was seriously blind for 10 minutes. not cool. afterwords cynthia and i go to the mall. while getting out of my car i notice i have my i.d tags connected to my shorts. so i unclip them and throw them in my car w.e w.e i have to purchase a new lipring, so i take out some cash lalala. cynthia has to get a dress for the quince taking place the following day. we pick out a lovely dress for her. yada yada. well, my i.d's are now m.i.a. and i can't really find my atm card. exactly. hmpf phooey. i have to call tomorrow to cancel it. pain in the arse. at first i wished i could punch a hole in both my atm and drivers license to connect them to my school & work i.d but now that i've lost my work/school i.d imagine how i would have lost all 4 cards at once. wacksauce. well, the only i.d i have left is my license, and that's only because i left it in my camera bag, in my car. aflanfl;naf oh there's more. the next morning cynthia and i have to clean condo's for my mom. i open the envelope my mom left for us [ our payment ] i'm counting my crisp, freshly atm'd bills. we left her house at about 8:55 a.m. plenty of time to stop and eat breakfast and head to ft. myers beach. cynthia wants mcdonalds [ i only want a hash brown ]but the line was mad long. she's like " yo forget it" dangit. i'm ready for dunkin donuts. (= i guess i was so infatuated with the fact that i got to have a dunkin donuts breakfast, that i passed the stupid place. by this time we're like 5/10 minutes late. i look at cynthia " should i? " she just laughs. yes nigga, i bust a u-turn to dunking donuts. by this time i'm hype, right? so we meander through the door, and in all my excitement i leave my money in the car and cynthia's like " forget it, i got you" so i take her 20. i'm standing waiting for my order, and i'm tapping my knuckles against the inside of the counter, money grasping the 20. well, blah blah blah, i drop the 20. right as i peered over the counter, the stupid thing slips through a crack. swear that thing went in slow motion. afanfl;an maybe if that bitch wasn't so fkin crisp, straight out the atm it wouldn't have slipped through a random crack so effortless and daintily. the guy behind the counter [ who i just so happened to have gone to europe with - shane ] was like " na, i got it" he whips out his credit card and swipes it. pays for our breakfast. i shake my head, run to my car.. get the 13.01 and hand it to me. he was hesitant at first, but he accepted. then i get to my car, and i hand cynthia one of my crisp 20's. that's 2 down. i ended up spending 33.01 on dunkin donuts O_o wacksauce to the fullest. anyways, we clean the houses. we find that we only have one roll of papertowels and zero soaps/toilet paper. well, it ende up that took the wrong supplies from the house. i'm so wompish. so i then had to go purchase the supplies to re-stock the condos. that's -10.23. so. basically. i lost 43.24. lost an atm card. lost 2 work i.d's and 1 school i.d oh and did i mention i lost my voice? yes nigga, that thing is GONE. saturday night i went to street warz. had a lot of fun (= took a few peectures. today i worked, i'm home now. i tried to trick myself into doing homework. but tomorrow there's fcat, and i've already passed so i'm not required to attend. lalala. bum status. (= night.

ay ay ay [Wednesday, February 21st 2007] watsup reader? i really need to get up on my journal entries. last night, i stayed the night at my friend Jesika's house to do homeowork. We stayed up until like 2:00 and ceased to complete out work. We did however, have ice cream intermissions. trust me, it was necessary. i walked into chemistry today. and keri goes' " she found our homework! " i got mad hyped. like " yes, not more 30 F, this lady is lucky she found that ish " .. this is all in my head of course. at the end of the class, i walk up like " hey, i hear you found my homework? " she looks at me blankly. " no. " .. " i found keri and veronica's " .. i was bent. i'm thinking " who the fk is veronica, since when did she have lost homeowrk?" dangit. i was excited for no reason. womp womped my day completely. whateverrr. i didn't have to work today. Ruben and i switched vehicles, he drove my honda, i drove his crx. (= coooooool. after that, i went home and napped like a beast, only to have my slumber interrupted by doorbell rings. i ignore them, thinking " whoever they are, they aren't important enough to discontinue my sleep. " my mom then calls me, and says " ay! get up and answer the door! the carpet cleaners are there" the hell. i wanted to sleep a sleepful sleep. what's this with doorbells & phones ringing. wack sauce to the coreeee. i keep getting college letter in the mail. no i'm not saying " yay i'm cool " i'm saying i'm nervous. i want to go to college, duh.. but being 16 and choosing a major.. ahfaj fwrpqwrqncq. but today, i got a letter from RIT. [ rochester institution of tech ] hmmmmmmmm.. i'm now at jennifers. about to drive home. i'll sleep once more, interrupt me and i may stab you. ummm to death. (=

hmpf [Friday, February 16th 2007] nigga. this week has been crasy sick nasty blah dee bloo. not really, sorry i lied to you. my chemistry teacher lost my homework which was 40 points. those 40 points were among a total of 65 in the class. ergo, she gave me a zero. and that zero makes my grade a 30 something F. i was/am heated. never have i ever had an F, nor do i wish to start now. it's one thing if it were my fault. but it's not. she lost my ish, and i pay for it? that's some wonky b.s. breath. anyways. i had totally forgotten wednesday was valentines day, until i saw everyone annoying dressed for the "holiday" at school. red, pink everywhere.. balloon.. cards.. flowers. just seemed like a regular day to me (= which was amazing, i didnt have to work. i did however, go to pick up my check. i went to cash it, but the bank was closed because of this "holiday." wacksauce. what else? cynthia and i came out of work today, to find lovely white surprises all over my car. yes, bird doo doo. " don't let that bird shit, he got a weak stomach. " lala. i'm working tomorrow morning with my mom. that's about all. (=

pffff nigga. [Wednesday, January 31st 2007] So i've been heavily exhausted lately. school + work + homework + no play = tired Sydni. womp womp. well i thought monday was horrid, well yesterday & monday. but today takes the cake. i was mega, uber, duberly tired. i go to work only to be asked to clean the kitchen since an inspector was there. i'm thinking just got a little bit until my trays are ready to be delivered. WELL i was incorrecctooo, for i cleaned for almost 4 hours. my back hurts. AND on top of that i found a little foil surprise under one of the steel counters. very curious, i chose to unwrap this delightful treat, only to discover my curiosity quickly turned into stupidity. the smell fkin jumped into my face like it was excited to be opened (and to see me of course). the deaf lady, ms carol walked by and said " that smells like rotten egg! " my eyes started to water now because the raunchy odor was burning my sensitive eyeballs. i reply " it is rotten eggs. " yuck. never in my life have i been so unlucky to waft such an unpleasent aroma. anyways. i ended up turning into a " #8 " which is the person who takes up late trays and blah blah. well there were like 50,0000 late trays, and things to be done en la cocina. pfffffff. OH! and last week i stayed up doing fifty notecards for ap psychology. guess what? i lost them bitches. k. goodnight. <3

dangit. [Tuesday, January 16th 2007] wow. has it been forever? or has it been forever? well two weeks ago i went to miami ALONE [ because nobody could/would go with me ] but i had a really good time. i met up with my buddies Jenny, Deezy. And i met a lot of their friends which was grand. We chilled at Studio A at the dunkXchange until 5:30'ish. we then made our way to baysides HOOTERS. =] yummm. Jenny kept ordering pickles like a doofus <3 lmao. Miyagi likes grabbing things.. like Jasmin's hair hahaha. Chris.. is that his name? CHRISS!!! lmao. okay so we were parking and "chris" went to park further down.. and we went to call his name.. except none of us knew it. so we all just stared at each other like. " umm.. shoutout a random name! " thank goodness Jasmin was like " um.. it's chris.. right? "ahhhhh lmao. anyways. there was some window shopping, wig trying on and watching drunks dance going onnn at Bayside. anyways. we them made our way to ft. myers to go "go kart racing" but the females ended up playing XTREME air hockey instead, teaching Jasmin to drive stick, and talking like girls doo. DUH. then i drove home. WOMP WOMP. i had to work the next day. LALALA. let's just skip these 2 weeks.. and hello. it's today! umm i felt ill all day today. i'm taking medication for my CRAZY lymph nodes that are swollen because of my ear tapers.. different medication because of my stupid allergic reaction to something.. [ little red itchy bumps! ] then i'm taking tylanol for my Xtreme cramps.. i think all that medication together is making me feel queezy or maybe i'm about to catch the flu. aghus faghus. today was my day off and i slept =] i just realized it was almost 11. so i must do homework and go back to bed now. umm i knew there was a lot more i wanted to talk about on here. .. but it's all slipped my mind. OHH!!! i freakin retardedly left the water running in the bathroom sink.. i'm not sure for how long.. but i know our entire house was flooded. and i was sucking up water for days. it's still not up. the carpet in the din was completely saturated.. gross. k night.

hola! [Saturday, December 30th 2006] why hello there reader. i'm sorry for slacking soo very much. today i woke up at 11:00 with a soar throat and lymphnodes (thanks a lot cynthia) and washed my car (inside and out) it was like 80 degrees. the hell is it doing that hot in the winter? somtimes i really dislike florida because of the weather. i enjoy cold winters. sheesh. around 2:20 i went to pick up cynthia and we went to work. the ride TO work is the worst part. that gives me time to think about everything i have to do. but once i'm there, the time passes so quickly and before i know it it's 7:30 and it's almost time to leave. there are no time for breaks, but i work in a kitchen =] so every chance i get i'm eating something. you know, taste testing LMAO. but other than that, i prepare the food, put it on trays, deliver the trays to patients, pick up the dirty trays, wash all the dishes and then prepare for the next day. it may sound bad but i like my job. i spend only 3 minutes maximm in a patients room and you wouldn't believe how happy they become after those 3 minutes. first off, i bring them food. most of the patients are elderly and havent eaten since before their procedure. so they're happy for that. second they're amazed that a high school student would have any interest in working in a hospital so they tend to engage in conversation and say wise things that they've learned throughut their lives. today was one mans last time in the hospital. i had been serving him since my first day working and as i was leaving he said " God bless you Sydni, you've made the past week brighter." i wasn't so suprised at him saying that because all the patients like to amp you up and give you compliments. i was amazed that he remembered my name. it was a nice and subtle feeling =]. lala, forgive my dorkiness. anyways. since i pierced my lip people have been calling me to do their piercings. let me remind you that i am not a professional. lmao. piercing yourself is nothing like piercing other people. i can feel when i have pain or if something isn't going as i planned. but anyways, a few of my friends trust me enough to puncture them. KABLAAM! good thing i work in a hospital right? i have hundreds of little alcohol toilettes and surgical gloves =] holla! i'm sanitary baby. anyways, Mark my manager... i guess has been getting a lot of calls from people asking about me. they say i'm a very lovely young lady and that they enjoy me serving. nigga, he gave me a chocolate (my manager) i'm cool =] today i came home to yet another box. but this wasn't just ANY ups package. this one had a christmas gift in it. one i bought for my self. any guesses? a fish eye lens =] yes dear, that's right. a fish eye lens. i'm mad excited but i barely know how to work my new camera i got for christmas. sheesh. i'm still excited.. dont kill my high. now, i'm finding that i'm typing too much. i worked the past 3 days at the hospital, and tomorrow i have to wake up at 6 a.m and work con mi madre limpiando casas . yuck. wacksauce. k. love you suckaface.

Hello Christmas. [Monday, December 25th 2006] Dear Reader, first off, how's your christmas? or just your day in general? mine's alright! i was awakened by the sweet aroma of bacon. i swear i thought it was a dream. mother never cooks anymore but anything can happen on christmas correct? i get up, brush my teeth and head to the kitchen. AHHHH french toast??!?! (#@*%(@(%&1*@$ freakin yum. meaniwhile, i'm the only one awake besides mother. Cierra and Jay are still asleep. I tried to wake cierra.. she just rolled over. Jay got angry at my mom vacuuming.. so he closed his door. womp. so i'm waiting.. times passing.. presents are calling my name. they're actually starting to walk closer and closer to me, taunting. i'm fighting temptation right now. it's been two hours. how long am i suppose to wait? gosh darnit. k. have a merry christmas reader. lava you. =]

LALALA [Friday, December 22nd 2006] Alroit. It's been a while since i've updated this thing, if you've noticed. I can't even remember where i left off. I know a lot of things interesting have happened, i just can't remember them right now to type about them. Anyways, this past week were finals and midterms before christmas break. YUCK. i'm so ready for next semester to start though. I was getting way too bord with my classes. This is my first day on christmas break, and i'm not doing anything. Eating caca at home. I hae an idea of what i'm getting Cierra for christmas, but it's a lot of work. AHHH i need to gets busy. I'd tell you, but you may talk to her.. and i don't want it slipping, anywhere. Maybe i should update this when i know what to say, cause right now, i'm sort of out of it.

wow. [Sunday, December 10th 2006] it's been forever hasn't it? hmm. i don't really know what to say. i went to NY. and i love(d) it. i wish i were there RIGHT NOW. i didn't get any "photography" in. All of the 600 photos we took were us being silly. in every picture there's like a head popping out of nowhere, and most of them were taken with "burst." so when you scanned through the flicks, it told a story. pretty hot if i do say so myself. i've had so much make-up work, that i still have finished with. YUCK. christmas is coming up. one of my first times staying in florida, verses going to my fathers. it's gonna be "different" but i'm excited to spend time with my mother, i miss us. i went for a job interview at the hospital last week to be a "hostess." errr for food and health services. the manager "mark" is really cool, and he says he'll call me monday [tomorrow] and let me know if i got the job or not. and then, wednesday ish i would get my blood and urine tets done. =] i'm excited, my first "real" job. and then on saturdays i'll work for my mom, and sundays RELAX. i need to keep myself busy, i've been getting way too lazy and slacking horridly in school. YUCK. DEEP BREATH IN, DEEP BREATH OUT. next semester will be better =]. i want to stab my AP statistics class in the eyeball.. yes nigga, through the conjunctive, cornea, iris, and retina. FORGET that class. lmao. it's driving me PSYCHO. anyways, i'm doing pretty well other than that. i came home from NY, and i couldn't sleep in my OWN BED! ROAR. you know how you go on vacation.. or staying elsewhere, and all you wanna do it go home and rest in your bed. mmmmm love that feeling. well someone is staying in there.. so i've had to sleep in my moms room the past week. don't get me wrong, i love my momma... but i want MY bed. :sighs: lmao. lemme hop off my pitty party train. i finally got a new phone. [penis #2] if you know me, you know that's what i call my cellularr. don't ask why, because i don't have an answer for you. =] hmmm. that's all for now. today's sunday.. i HAVE to finish my make-up and studay for 3 tests. [ two in american history, one in english ] andi have to read an entire book. SPARK NOTES! shhhhh. i'm cheating. wait... ahhhh. the other day my mom was talking about this guy that likes her, and she was like " oh my gosh, this kid is on my sack!" .. i died. lmao <3momma.

chyea [Monday, November 27th 2006] hello lovely. well well well. i got my report card today. slap in the face. i know i've been dead lazy.. slackin like psycho.. but cot damn. so today i got inspired.. i came home and did all of my homework, i washed my daughter, burned alina her cd she's been waiting for, i'm gonna fill my tank up with gas, clean my room and try to get a good nights rest. yea yea it'll prolly only be like that for today and tomorrow.. straight back to slacking. yuck. i need to do something with myself, like seriously. i have an anatomy test tomorrow on the digestive system, and i think i'll do well. [hopefully] i'm working on a project for american history.. and i'm reading "the great gatsby" for english. i lost my ap statistics book, and i'd love it if someone would help me find it. out of all the classes.. the one i dislike the most.. imagine me spending 80 dollars on something you hate? yucky caca pooey. i need to spend more time with Bagheera, she likes my mom more. imagine when i have kids? imma never let them see their grandparents until they're like 18. freakin grandparents always spoiling and trying to look good. >=[ GOSH. haha. just kidding lovers. 1

turkey day. [Friday, November 24th 2006] yo. how are you on this fine turkey day? dangit! tomorrow is black friday.. i wanna shop but i'm in debt lmao. and i get to spend time with family =]. can you believe.. all sisters are staying under the same roof? brother-in-law , niece and nephews, dad and chel. =] dangit. pretty cool if you ask me. feels so different from florida and how our family relationship is there. hmmmm. one isn't superior to the other, it's just different. anyways, kansas is so brown and blah, yet so beautiful at the same time. the empotyness is calming and interesting in it's own way. we piced up my brother in law today from the airport.. and as we were driving out to the house he asked " is that cotton? " .. cotton fields are so pretty =] i had almost forgotten. the sunsets here are flippin gorgeous. i wish i had my camera. womp womp. dangit, i'm going to newyork without a camera? can't be possible. swear i just wanna save money to travel .. just me and someone else [ so i'm not lonely ] and take thousands of pictures. i wanna go to every state .... enough with that.. you dont wanna hear about that ish. ahh. poor Donald [krista, my sisters boyfriend] my sister christina and i interrogated him for atleast 2 hours. at first we were playing around, and i had been documenting his life story by drawing childish picture versions of it. then the sillyness turned into a therapy session for their relationship. bizzarre!! and he was uncomfortable with answering our questions in front of her.. and we actually got them to as each other things they'd been wanting to.. but couldn't. it was actually theraputic for me. made me THINK about opening up more. >.< just think about it though.. weird. i think we might have strengthened their relationship. damn, we're good. we made them sign the paper and date it lie retards.. and rate us on a scale how good our wor was. lmao. ahh. i played 6/6 dominoes last night for the first time in years. ahh i one like a beast with 330 points. and 2nd place was like 140 points. dangit. :taes a bow: i don't even have to say it, you already know :winks: just kidding. yuck, i'm dreading going bac to school. i wanna stay on vacation [sandlot]FOREVER!![/sandlot]

[Sunday, November 12th 2006] uh. HIII so today i bummed around my house until 3-ish.. and i then went to Stephen's suprise birthday party. you weren't invited? dang, you suck yo. lmao. na. it was cool. i was excited for him =] i remember a suprise birthday party my dad and other mother through for me.. i got so emberassed. i tend to do that. i love being with jennifer's family. they seem so happy all the time, even through all the ish i hear about.. everyones still so loving and warm. i lava it. i fell asleep on her trampoline. it was lovely actually. the material was really cold, but i had my arms tucked crossed under my chest and my head on a fluffy pillow, so i kept warm. and it could have easily replaced my roof as the best star looking spot, but since my eyeballs were burning so badly.. i felt sleeping was better. passed the time by like 30 minutes.. but gave me enough energy for the rest of the night. although.. i was disturbed by a posse of black folk coming to jump.. i heard them coming.. so i half awakenly rolled off the side.. with a sudden rush of blood to the head.. i was so dizzy and still a little out of it.. and felt like a barbaric cavewoman waking up after her winters nap lmao "ugh" after i dropped ruben off at home, i went to my house to pick up money and see Bagheera. I always miss her. She's like my outlet to happiness besides music. If i'm upset or feeling BLAH i go home, lay on my bed, sleep with her while listening to tunage yo. i know what you're thinking, "sad"...and dont call me wack, that hurts. :winks: but yea, i went back to jennifers, and we watched videos from her old practices and listened to reggae. [ uh huh, my favorite ] i wanted to dance. [shhh] but there were too many people. ha. jennifer wanted to dance too. i knew it! .. i got my eyebrows done while waiting for the movie to start. we saw borat. ish was funny. it was slow for some parts, but for others.. my side was splitting like CRAZY. mike fell asleep.. his drunk self. LMAO ahhhhhh.. as i was driving home.. my dumb gauges turned off. so i couldn't see how fast i was going. or my rpm's. the hell. i need to get that checked out. that frightened me. there was a huge KOMBAT when i got home. freakin laz, jay, and andy were arguin over who knows what. people were drunk/gone and eyebrows were shaved.. and people ended up fighting... bloody lips and ish. that was like an hour ago.. and there's still ranting about it. roar. what the hell am i doing wide awake at 4:37 a.m ? i guess all the comotion from the day is keepin me WIRED. or possibly that 30 minute trampoline power nap? i should have those more often. don't ya think? thanks for agreeing.

lala [Saturday, November 11th 2006] It's 2:03 a.m and i'm just watching movie clips on youtube [love and basketball] jennifer and i went on a crazy travel to labelle to see our school's football game. ish took forever to get to but it was something to keep me busy. honestly, i didn't even want to go.. but to see her happy with sir zeeky boy was a good enough motivation for me. when i got there, it was exactly what i thought it would be like... yea about that... anyways. afterwords a few of us went to wafflehouse. =] FREAKIN YUM. well i ate the CapnCrunch that was in my car and i ordered some bacon with it. DELICIOUS! mike fell asleep in my car while i listened to music, and jennfier and zeeky boy chilled. after dropping off jennifer, i had THE most relaxing drive home. I rolled down my windows, and put the heater on my feet.. listened to a slow jam cd i made and floated home. =] freakin lovely. it was sooo lovely that i even sat in my car for an extra 10 minutes to finish the cd. bummy? i think not! i needed it. i'm really really tired. but i can't sleep. dumb i know. let it be. 2

ahh [Friday, November 10th 2006] okay. so i almost died today! i was freakin driving to bonita, to my sisters school to get a perm! [ uh huh curls! ] so i'm on the highway, and some truck in front of me apparently has boxes full of architecture blue prints. well one of the boxes flies into the air, and the papers flew everywhere, uh huh covering my car. i couldn't see anything! i used the windshield whipers.. and blah blah so i had to pull over. it was so scarey. but funny afterwords thinking of what i looked like covered in paper >.< ahh. well!!!! now, i'm not sure what i'm doing. but HAPPY VETERANS DAY! and maybe i'll see you out somewhere. be safe! =] ♥ oh yea! and no i didn't end up getting a perm, cause i took the wrong 41 and ended up in estero! so by the time i got to her school it was too late. so instead i got a trim. well the trim somehow turned into a cut. Cierra got a little scissor happy i think. oh well.

ahhhh [Wednesday, November 1st 2006] Hello. Sorry, it's been awhile. this week has been excrutiatingly busy, although i'm not sure why. life is so hectic.. i wanna press pause. ROAR. let me entertain you with more of my materialistic stress. So last christmas ['05] i was thankfully given a p850 kodak easyshare. 5.1 mp. Which is what 98% of my photos you see here were taken with. Well, by April of '06 the camera had crashed. And by crashing i mean it refused to turn on. I thought it was the battery, i charged it. I thought maybe it was the charger? So i got a new one. Nope. .. I finally got around to exchanging it for a bran new p850. =] everything was fine and dandy until yesterday. the SAME thing happened. i was so eager to take pictures of the cute little trick-o-treaters on halloween. i pulled out my camera [ i had charged both of my batteries for preperation ] and nothing but a blank black screen. the first time it had happened, i thought i had just gotten a dud. but it's the SAME camera, SAME thing happened.. within about the SAME amount of time. I can't afford to replace my camera every 6 months. sheesh who can? photography has always just been a side hobby of mine. i've always been into art, since i was a toddler... but drawing and painting was never my thing. picking up a camera, and capturing the essence of life in every take started to infatuate me. more so, recently. and RIGHT when i get MORE into my hobby.. slowly.. and quite possibly turning into a passion.. My camera crashes. a horrid thing i know. but i choose to look at it as a sign. a sign telling me i need to upgrade to a better camera, and turn my hobby into something else. but, i'm not SERIOUS about the stuff i do. it's all just spontaneous captures. i'm going to have to research and become very aware of everything that has to do with cameras. and by that time [6mos-year] maybe i'll have enough money to purchase that camera. =] venting venting. you never realize how much you use something, until it's not there. such as my vroom vroom vehicle, my camera, my cell phone, even my pencil. ROAR.

woah. [Monday, October 23rd 2006] hi everyone. i know i should be extremely happy right now, i'm getting more passionate about photography, i'm doing alright in school, i get my car back sometime this week, i'm going to orlando this weekend for holloween horror nights, i have the best family and friends anyone could ask for... yet i'm still stressed too often .. sleepy too often.. bored too often.. lonely too often and i feel empty. THE HELL. makes absolutelt zero sense, but i'm not sure how else to explain it. extremely happy on the outside. semi-miserable on the inside? no no, i'm not miserable.. just confused? lmao. help me you help helpers! don't forgot how thankful i am for everything i'm given, even though i may seem materialistic at times.. i can only blame it on the culture i've been brought up in. blah blah.. rah rah nobody wants to hear this bull caca. i picked up an old sketchbook from 8th grade. call it an epiphany if you wish, but i've taken soo many photos the past year or so. i forgot how to draw.. and if i start up again.. i figure it'll be beneficial. cause i love taking pictures of expressions. and i think if i learn to draw them. i'll be MORE INTOUCH with the elements. and thus a better photographer. correct? haha wow, i'm blabby wappy today ay? making no sense. tis alright, bare with me. que mas? ehhhhhh hmmm ehhhh. BYE. =]

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